It's All About CLECO

The number 1 issue in Alexandria right now is utilities.  The highest reading on the Mini Mayor Misery Index is CLECO.  Mini Mayor doesn't want to talk about it.  The To-To doesn't want to talk about it.  KALB doesn't want to talk about it.  Ro Jo and the rest of the council (except for Ed Larvadain) doesn't want to talk about it.  See why your utility bills are so high?  Nobody in power wants to change anything because all these powerful people benefit from robbing you.

But Madiba, you ask, "You can't be serious?"  Well my friends, Madiba is dead serious.  CLECO, Mini Mayor and Ro Jo have conspired to keep your utilities unaffordable.  Why?  Because CLECO executives get rich and they can pass white envelopes  to Mini Mayor and Ro Jo.  Maybe even buy them some fancy meals or send their families on some nice vacations.  Know who else gets rich?  Mini Mayor's lawyer friends.  They got millions and you'll get nothing.    Are you waiting for your rebate?  There are no rebates!  Don't be a fool!  Don't let Mini Mayor and Ro Jo get away with this scam!  If you want affordable utilities, only one candidate has said she will give it to you - Von Jennings.  Because Von is not owned by the powers in this town.  Von is grassroots.  Vote for Von and you can use your heater this winter.

Readers Think Roy Is Paying Rev. Franklin

Look, people, we don't know if it did happen or not, but there is a big time rumor that Mayor Jacques Roy paid Rev. Joe Franklin to get in the race so as to dilute the vote in the black community.Maybe if we had real journalists in this town, we wouldn't have to put a poll.  Why Mini Mayor never been asked this question before?  To-To?  Caveman?

One thing that gives this rumor some truth is it definitely sounds like something this racist mayor would do.  The other thing that gives this rumor truth is Rev. Joe Franklin told everybody he wasn't going to run cause he wanted to focus on his ministry.  What happened to Rev. Joe Franklin's ministry?  Guess he got over that.  The other thing is that Rev. Joe Franklin's wife, Sandra, is now running for office too.  Things that make ya go hmmm.  Where do the Franklins get enough money to run two campaigns?  Our readers seem to think they know the answer.

THE ROY BOYZ ARE GIVING REV. FRANKLIN CAMPAIGN MONIES.

Yes	20 (83%)
No	3 (12%)
Don't know	1 (4%)

Votes so far: 24
Poll closed 

An Open Letter To The To-To

Dear Caveman Carty,

When are you going endorse Mini Mayor?  Just really curious how long you gonna wait and what excuse you gonna give.  We just wondering so we can start making fun of it.

Your servants of the Truth,

Jacques Barack

Road To Nowhere

It's September Twenty-Ten
Good times since can't remember when

The Apocalypse is nigh
But they still ain't finish Versailles

So long Sugarhouse Road Extension
You died from the mayor's inattention

Four years and millions later
The whole thing useless as a crater

Mini Mayor signed with HIP
But them boys gave him the slip

There is no safe levees
Thanks to our town heavies

Rapides Hospital laughed to the bank
And left us with the stank

Rapides pays the mayor's wife
She got a pretty good life

Harry Silver is on the board
We in trouble, oh Lord!

Have mercy on our city
Save us from this pity

We're on the Road To Nowhere

A PSA From Laurence Fishburne

Most of you will remember me as Morpheus from The Matrix. I want to talk to you today about Evil. Evil in all it's incarnations. It is all around us people. We are all connected and our actions have an effect on everyone around us. Have you ever heard of the Butterfly Effect? It's real. Every time you lie, you let Evil into your heart and you pass that Evil onto others. Before you know it, your 18 year old daughter is making porn tapes and you can't buy all of them off the market. It's hell people. We must stop this. We must fight Evil in all its forms, whether it's a paid city blogger spreading lies or a mayor who cannot tell the truth. If we continue to sit by quietly and let these lies pass, pretty soon all our daughters will be making porn tapes.

A Month To Go And No Scheduled Debates

This is an important election.  We got a clown - a really sad unfunny clown - as mayor.  This clown mayor can't even make basic city services work.  He did not protect our levees when he worked for the Levee District.  His wife even work for the Rapides Foundation levee busters.  He could not get our money back from Cleco.  He lied about HIP.  Clown mayor has a friends and family promotional deal down at city hall.  How else Lamar got a job?  Incompetence.  Nobody does it better than Mini Mayor.  Alexandria stands of the verge of the Apocalypse.  The Horsemen are riding into town.  Can't we at least have 1 debate before we slide into the abyss?

Mini Mayor in Mess With EMS

Well, well, well. What do we have here? Mini Mayor's pants is on fire today. All of those lies and cheating is catching up with Mini Mayor. We know there are no rebates. His wife know about the other women. We know he lied about the levees. We know he fired Von Jennings for doing her job. We know he's lying about HIP. His Catholic peeps know he's part of Larry Love's flock.  We know he lied to Rev. Franklin about the monies.  We know he reads blogs. We know he wanted Lamar to run that hit piece on Myron Lawson and David Pugh.  Etc, etc.  The boy just lies.  That's all he know how to do.  Lie.

What has all of this lead up to? Now the people that Mini Mayor represents as a lawyer in private practice are suing Alexandria. And these people are using the contract that Mini Mayor wrote to sue the city. People, where is the ethics charges? We here at Jacques Barack will be the first in the local blogosphere to call for Mini Mayor to step down. Through his duplicity and conflicts of interest on the CLECO case and representing EMS, Mini Mayor is unfit to remain as Mayor of Alexandria. We invite the Alexandria News Weekly, our local bloggers and The Town Talk to join us in asking for Mini Mayor to resign his post in this time of great shame.

Mini Mayor Loses Big To David Pugh and Ro Jo

Little known fact - half of the articles that appear in the To-To are written by Dr. Evil.  Don't look surprised, people.  Wake up!  You are pawns in the petty little power games that Dr. Evil and his cronies use to keep control of Alexandria.  Do you really believe that the council is more to blame for Alexandria's sad state of affairs or is it the lazy pathological Mercedes Benz driving Mini Mayor?  If you think Myron Lawson runs the city or keeps Dr. Evil from having his way, then check yourself into a mental clinic ASAP.  And if you really think that 8000 people voted in the To-To's mayor poll, you are beyond the help of any mental care professional.  For those of you who know better, there is Jacques Barack.  We run our own independent polls.  Polls that Dr. Evil, Mini Mayor and Fetal Freddy can't manipulate without detection.

GIVEN THE CHOICE BETWEEN MINI MAYOR AND DAVID PUGH,

I prefer the lying unethical paranoid Mini Mayor.	9 (15%)
I prefer David Pugh.	50 (84%)

Change your vote

Votes so far: 59
Poll closed

GIVEN THE CHOICE BETWEEN MINI MAYOR AND RO JO,

I prefer the lying unethical paranoid Mini Mayor.	11 (34%)
the dumb as Charlie Sheen Robo Ro Jo.	21 (65%)

Change your vote

Votes so far: 32
Poll closed 

Does Roland Fontaine Charge HIP $125 Per Hour?

MC Long Blade is back and his research shows what a joke HIP is. Did you know that HIP doesn't have any employees? Did you know that HIP can't produce any tax returns to prove it exists? Did you know that HIP hasn't created any jobs anywhere? That's right. HIP is a sham. Why is that you say? Well look at this FAQ excerpt from Roland Fontaine's website for Creative Analytical Solutions. Do you see HIP anywhere on here? We know Mini Mayor did it for the money, but was it too hard for the To-To to do a little homework on these con artists?  If Caveman Carty and Bret McMagnon aren't too lazy, they can find the phone number and email at the bottom and contact Mr. Fontaine with these questions: Did Roland Fontaine charge HIP for a business plan cause HIP might want to contact the Arizona BBB about that piece of trash? For laughs, what is HIP's "visionary" statement? Does Roland Fontaine charge HIP $125 per hour and has Roland Fontaine/Creative Analytical Solutions billed Alexandria for any time he spent on HIP? Check it out peeps: Creative Analytical Solutions - FAQs

What do you charge for your services? I consult on an hourly rate of $125 per hour. There are no additional costs as all incidental charges, with the exception of out of state travel, are absorbed by Creative Analytical Solutions. What would an average business plan cost? There is no such concept as an "average" business plan. Each plan must be tailored to the individual or company as well as for the audience to whom it is being presented. You should expect to pay a minimum of $1,500 up to $5,000 or more for a specific plan to meet your business needs. How can I control the total cost of a plan? The cost of a Plan, or any other consulting task Creative Analytical Solutions may perform, can easily be controlled by the amount of effort and time contributed by a business owner. The more involvement of the individual the lower the cost and the better the outcome! What's involved in preparing a Business Plan? The first step consists of a free session to determine how to make your vision real. At this meeting you and I would agree on a "visionary" statement and assess the current information currently available and the data that would be required. The second step would be to determine the level of your involvement and establish a realistic timeframe for the project. The third step builds the plan from the operational, financial, marketing and strategic information available, tailoring the plan to a specific audience. The last step would be the presentation and implementation of the plan. How often should I put together, or modify, a business plan? A good plan should be reviewed and updated every year. No business can grow without changes in operations to meet the current market. A quick review with financial goal [budget] updating should take less than one day each year and ensure that your visions are being realized.

[Home] [Why?] [Roland] [FAQs] [Contact Us]  7418 East Helm Drive Scottsdale, AZ 85260 Tel: (480) 443-2713 Fax: (480) 443-2752 fntbell@uswest.net

Clan of the To-To

Twins?  Brothers?  You be the judge.

Clan of the To-To.  They never discovered fire and couldn't attract women.

The Mothership Will Be Here Soon

 

Did we miss something or is medical ganja legal in Louisiana?  Or maybe Carty is cracking up because he can't handle any more 3 AM phone calls from Mini Mayor.  Carty sounded like he consumed some maui gold and was walking around Encinitas with the munchies and looking for the Mothership.  We couldn't make any sense of Carty's editorial on Sunday.  Forrest Gump?  Box of chocolates.  This is what you went to college for?  Speaking of trying one, why don't you call up Rapides Regional and ask them where they got permission to cut the levee.  Why don't you ask Rapides Regional for their permit?  Why don't you ask Rapides Regional if they gonna fix the levee?  Oh, what that you said?  You're too busy eating baby ruths floating in the pool?

 

Carty tells us he's gotten too close to young boys in the pool.  He tells us he meets Auntie Gaga for coffee, but apparently he can't understand her because he's suffering from Alzheimer's.  Or was it just the maui gold?  Listen, Carty need a break.  Bad.  Carty need to give McCormick some time off too.  McCormick been writin down every last word that Mini Mayor and Ken Luneau gave him.  When the newspaper starts quoting that great philosopher Forrest Gump, you might want to consider canceling your subscription.  Really, the more appropriate quote from Forrest Gump is Stupid is as Stupid does.

 

Where The Debates?

We have previously called for a mayoral debate or a series of mayoral debates.  There are serious problems facing Alexandria, but Alexandria's media seems to ignore it.  Hey, it's only the future of Alexandria at stake.  Who gonna step up?  Or y'all just waitin for the apocalypse?

To-To Finances Must Be So-So

Has anyone noticed that the To-To is just 2 sections now?  A and B.  That's it.  A and B.  That's pathetic.  To-To don't even waste anytime putting news in those 2 sections.  Oh and thanks for that senior citizen insert the other day.  Carty, if you would remove your nose from Mini Mayor's crack and write about Mini Mayor's lawbreaking and lying, then you might get some readers.  Our view is that its just 2 less sections devoted to spreading Mini Mayor lies.  We already called you out back in TT:  Death of Journalism.  If you want any news, you got to go to Jacques Barack.  Plain and simple.

Carty and McCormick Ridin Dirty

Jacques, when you and Ho-Ho called the Po Po on the To-To, you unleashed the Kracken.  You know they ran that Woodworth story right next to this one about how you couldn't even announce you was runnin for mayor.  Bro, they are spankin yo *** like you was a day care run by R. Kelly. McCormick was rollin with this:

City Notebook: Alexandria mayor's race is on a low simmer

Bret H. McCormick

bmccormick@thetowntalk.com

No potential candidates for mayor of Alexandria made formal announcements last week, but there was and is plenty of chatter about the election in the fall, nonetheless.

Mayor Jacques Roy, who has been tight-lipped about his plans, held a fundraiser Saturday night. "Friends and supporters" were invited to a crawfish boil at Spirits Food & Friends on Texas Avenue, according to an e-mailed invitation sent by Roy's wife, Wendy.

Why no formal announcement, Jacques?  Can't make up yo mind?  You get that McCormick was laughin at your lame fundraiser, right?  McCormick put friends and supporters in quotes so, yeah, he was laughing.  Jacques, we are all laughin at you for hiding behind yo wife.  And then you had Kay Michiels do your dirty work.  What up, dawg?  You not up to the job?  Carty and McCormick didn't seem to think so.

One resident, Von Jennings, has said publicly she will enter the race.

Another, District G Rapides Parish Police Juror Steve Coco, says he intends to run.

"I can hardly believe that it is time again to begin campaigning," Wendy Roy says in the e-vitation.

I bet she can't believe it.  I bet she ain't smilin like that right now either.  Her man bout to be thrown out of office.  Like a Bolton Avenue hooker.  Jacques, man, hiding behind women and asking them to do your work is, well, pretty much like being a wussy momma's boy.

We already revealed to our readers how you ain't a decider.  Jacques Barack is calling you out, Jo-Jo Bling-Bling.  Either announce within the next week that you are seeking re-election or hang it up.  Do you really want another 4 years of Jacques Barack exposing you for the fraud you are? The countdown starts today.  If you don't announce by next Wednesday the 21st, you have been warned.

Jacques Smart Growth

Welcome to Smart Growth for Alexandria, Jacques M. Roy style!  LOL!  Jacques idea of smart growth is no growth.  The growth flees to the suburbs.  Bro, you and Ho-Ho got Paul Carty so mad he went and ran this embarrassing Woodworth story on yo ***.  And he ran it right next to a story on the mayors race!  Ha ha ha ha.  LOL!  In yo face frat boy.  Carty just fed you his used toilet paper!  Hey, why don't you get in yo $60,000 Mercedes and drive out to Woodworth for a lil reconnaissance mission on what growth looks like.

Hey, anybody who still in love of Jacques, do you remember what Jacques #1 campaign platform was?  Yeah!  It was smart growth.  Have you seen any smart growth in Alexandria over the last four years?  Uh, have you seen any growth?  And don't be tellin us the new Chick-fil-A is growth.  There was a business there before Chick-fil-A.  Try again.  And we don't want to say anything bad about honest work at a fast food restaurant, but it ain't high tech.

How them property tax receipts comin from all the new business you created, Jacques?  How's it going at the Fulton Hotel?  How bout Union Tank?  How are things at that fancy city golf course right next to the other fancy golf course?  How's that for smart growth!  Let's put a bunch of golf courses right next to each other.  Right on!  And let's leave Alexandria and put these new baseball fields out here away from all those uh, you know, inner city types.  Rapides Regional, you want to close off 4th Street?  Hey, be our guest!  Our citizens don't need 4th Street and don't worry about the levee either, just make sure my wife has a $100,000 a year job were she can raise money for my non-campaign.

Thank you Jacques!  Thank you for your vision of smart growth!  Thank you for all the prosperity!  Yeah, the city is just rollin in money, right?  Jacques vision has really paid off for us, right?  No, we got a smart *** for a mayor, but no smart growth.

Unemployed Alexandrians at work

Jo-Jo and Ho-Ho Call Po-Po on To-To

It's Sunday and this is one of the few days that people might actually pick up a newspaper so we thought we'd give Paul Carty a golf clap for actually allowing his staff to do some investigative journalism on the downtown hotels deal last Sunday.

 

Bro, the TT did such a nice job that Bling-Bling Jo-Jo and ole man Ho-Ho said it were a No-No.   So Jo-Jo called up the Po-Po.  We at Jacques Barack obtained a transcript of the call via a public records request.  Here it is reprinted:

APD dispatch:  Dispatch.

Jo-Jo:  This is the mayor.

APD dispatch:  Uh, you again?  Oh, you know we not yo personal PI's, aight?

Jo-Jo:  I know, but Mark's not in right now and the TT is ridin dirty! I need a squad car at Paul Carty's now.

APD dispatch:  Our caller ID show this call from Spirits.  Are you drunk right now?

Jo-Jo:  Damn civil service.  Give me TW.  Now!

APD dispatch:  Wait for the transfer.

TW:  Hello?

Jo-Jo:  TW, man, where did you slip off to last night?

TW:  Uh, I got a little tired and it was late so I gave that guy whose name you kept forgetting?

Jo-Jo:  Yeah, slender, bout 5'8.

TW:  Yeah, yeah.  Him.  I gave him a ride home and got to bed.  Listen, where are you?  It's 5 in the morning.

Jo-Jo:  You know Carty gives me a copy of every paper the day before its printed, right?

TW:  Well, I knew ya'll were close, but --

Jo-Jo:  I'm not close to that son of a -----!  What are you talking about?

TW:  Well, I mean --

Jo-Jo:  (5 minutes of complaing about Paul Carty)

TW:  Wow.  That's a mouthful.

Jo-Jo:  I don't want to hear about your personal life TW.  Let's stay on subject here.  Anyway, I didn't pay attention to the draft that Carty left in my office on Friday cause those people from Hollywood were in town but this is complete BS!  And its too late!  He already printed it.  I mean, it's slander TW!  I need Carty hauled in.

TW:  Uh, Jacques, slander is not a crime.

Jo-Jo:  Are you lecturing me about the law?  Seriously?  Do you want me to Bridgett Brown your (expletive)?  Now listen to me or it's gonna take you another $5000 donation to keep your job!  Get a squad car over to Carty's and scare the (expletive) out of him.  Put the fear of Jacques in his candy (expletive).

TW:  Right away, sir!

(TW calls Cliff Gatlin):  Hello?

TW:  Cliff, its TW, no time for questions.  I need a squad car over to Paul Carty's house.  I need to scare him up a little.  Not Andrew Molett style.  Just Richard Nunnally style.  Yeah, just Richard Nunnally style.  You know, rough him up a little but let him off.

Gatlin:  Uh, OK.

(Gatlin calls Carty):  Hello?

Gatlin:  I need you to leave your house now.  Jacques is off his meds again.

Carty:  Will do!

Jacques see me rollin
Jacques hatin
Patrolling Jacques tryin to catch me ridin dirty
Tryin to catch me ridin dirty
Tryin to catch me ridin dirty
Tryin to catch me ridin dirty
Tryin to catch me ridin dirty
My paper sold out
I'm swangin
Jacques hopin that they gon catch me ridin dirty
Tryin to catch me ridin dirty
Tryin to catch me ridin dirty
Tryin to catch me ridin dirty
Tryin to catch me ridin dirty

Paul, dawg, you bringin it hard tonight!  Doesn't it feel good doin your job for a change?  Doesn't it feel good exposing Jo-Jo and Ho-Ho for the hot ghetto mess they are?  Man, you keep this up and Jacques ain't gonna invite y'all to no more of his keggers anymore or tell y'all stories about all the panties he gets in the mail.  But you could get some readers.

Alexandria is $9 Million in the Hole

This is your money.

"Committee members took a look March 30 and started to discuss how to eliminate a deficit of about $9 million before May 1, the start of the fiscal year."

First time you've heard of it, right?  Still think the TT does any good reporting?  We haven't heard Jacques or any of his friends on the council talk about being $9 million over budget.

This is Jacques spending your money.

Somebody get the plunger!

"Mayor Jacques Roy wants the council to concentrate the city's capital funds on efforts to bring private investment to a downtown hotel plan and on other projects detailed in the Specially Planned Activity Redevelopment Corridors, the citywide SPARC infrastructure project."

Von Jennings top campaign pledge is "conservate financial management".  Whadda think about Von now?

False Prophet

What did Jesus warn us of false prophets?

Beware of false prophets, which come to you in sheep's clothing, but inwardly they are ravening wolves. (Mat 7:15)

Jacques was a small time lawyer who used a high profile case to rise to local fame.  When he was an attorney against Cleco he gave us every reason to mistrust Cleco.  He only did it to shine his own star.  Jacques was lying.  Jacques was saying those things so that we would elect him.  It doesn't matter all those other things that Jacques told us during the campaign.  Smart growth?  Cleco was the single issue that made his political run.  Jacques used the Cleco issue and our high utility bills as his springboard.  It worked.  But Jacques wasn't going to hold Cleco to the truth.  He just wanted to be mayor.

Ye shall know them by their fruits. Do men gather grapes of thorns, or figs of thistles? (Mat 7:16)

Before he was mayor, Jacques was the attorney for the Levee District.  The same Levee District that bears no fruit, only thorns and thistles.  Jacques is well aware of the do nothing Levee District.  He himself has financial gain from emplyment with the do nothing Levee District.  His father replaced Jacques as the attorney for the Levee District.  Jacques expects us to believe that he wasn't a part of this playboy organization of good ole boys?  Jacques expects us to believe that he doesn't have a conflict as the past attorney and his father as the current attorney at the Levee District?  Jacques expects us to believe that he wasn't helping out his playboy friends by having the city hire Owen & White to do the levee certification work?  Shame on us if we would buy this pack of obscene lies from Jacques M. Roy.

A good tree cannot bring forth evil fruit, neither can a corrupt tree bring forth good fruit. (Mat 7:18)

Everything that Jacques does is built around his own political gain.  You know the type.  A guy who would sell out his own mother just to get elected.  We got a lot of those types in this country.  Nothing good can come from this sort of selfishness.  It is a tree that bears evil fruit.

Every tree that bringeth not forth good fruit is hewn down, and cast into the fire. (Mat 7:19)

The TT has been giving us more and more reasons why nobody should read it.  They are in love with Jacques.  They believe his lies are the truth.  They love Jacques the way that the Sanhedrin loved Barabbas over Jesus.  Where do you think Barabbas and the Sanhedrin are now?  This is what God has in store for those who lie, think only of themselves and prey on the good intentions of others.

TT: Death of Journalism

Today TT opens year 128 of disinformation.  The mission of the TT is to suck up to local politicians and the powerful.  They've done a great job.  TT mainly print news releases from city hall, businesses and other politicians.  They ain't lookin out for you the reader.  No No No.  If they were, they'd look into this

http://jacquesbarack.blogspot.com/2010/03/rapides-regional-killed-downtown-now.html

or this

http://jacquesbarack.blogspot.com/2010/03/rapides-regional-silence-is-deafening.html

or this

http://jacquesbarack.blogspot.com/2010/03/oh-snap-ordinance-no-184-2008.html

They'd get up in David Williams face and ask him why Rapides Regional cut the levee and when Rapides Regional was going to fix it.

They go do some research to figure out who let Rapides Regional cut the levee.

They'd get up in Chris Brouillette's face and ask him what he's been doing all these years and where's the permits for Rapides Regional and the Pentecostals.

They'd get up in Jacques face and ask him what he did when he was employed by Chris Brouillette and why he's been lying about the city's role in the levee mess.

They'd get up in Jacques face and ask him why he hasn't demanded that Rapides Regional fix the levee problem they caused.

They'd get up in Harry Silver's face and ask him what he plans to do about the Rapides Regional levee problem as a board member.

They'd get up in Jacques face and ask him if he got any money from Cleco or if his campaign is looking for money from Cleco.

They'd get up in Jacques face and ask him if the economy is so bad, why he's driving a new $60,000 Mercedes?  Did Cleco pay for it or does the mayor make too much money?

No, TT ain't gonna do that.  Don't call yourselves journalists when all you are is a copier and a suckup.

Rapides Regional - The Silence is Deafening

We found out last Wednesday that a parking lot at Rapides Regional is one of the reasons that our levees cannot be certified and that this may cost every house in Rapides Parish about $5000 to fix.  We asked for answers.  Can you hear the crickets?

Surely Rapides Regional must have the permit that it obtained to cut the levee, right?  Rapides Regional did get a permit, right?  Now that the Rapides parking lot is preventing the levee certification, how long does Rapides Regional expect us to wait before it corrects the problem?  Why isn't Jacques putting any pressure on Rapides Regional?  Why isn't the editorialboard@thetowntalk.com asking these questions?  It would be nice if Rapides Regional could issue a press release and clear this up for us.  Until Rapides Regional steps up and puts these questions to rest,  we invite all of our readers to contact the CEO of Rapides Regional, David Williams, and demand some answers.

Or maybe y'all like paying $5000 for flood insurance so David Williams can enjoy a fat salary and fat bonuses.