Champagne And Cocaine. And Crime.

There's nothing wrong with cocaine if you think you are one of the greatest people that ever lived. There's nothing wrong with cocaine if you think it makes you more productive.  I'm not saying those things are true, but I am saying that cokeheads always come up with some excuse that doing lines is OK.  Just like there's always an excuse for dating a woman outside your marriage.

So our unclassified city employees may be having some wild parties at city hall?  Who cares as long was the city is running right?  That's the problem.  This city isn't running right.  Why?  Because the people we elected to run the city have been partying and not working.  This is also why we've seen crime spike so high in the last few years.  When the mayor is always breaking the law, it gets more and more difficult for the police to punish behavior that is OK for some but not others.  Want a city that works and has less crime?  Then vote for a new mayor.

The Dynamic Duo Of Do Nothing Good

Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Dum?

Me Me Me Me Me Me Me Me Me Me

Hey Good Lookin!

Jacques Crazy

Jacques is Whack.  LiveBlogger gave me the clip above.  That's Jacques taunting our website.  Come on, Jacques!  We know you read us.  I don't care what any of the Jacques people say about how smart he is or how many big words he knows.  What difference does it make?  If knowing big words made you a great mayor, Pat Sajak would be President of the World.  Got it?  The question is what kind of mayor is Jacques?  Not very good.  Whatever brains he has he wastes on trying to belittle people.  All of Jacques' energy is wasted fighting with people.  Don't believe me?  Call him up tomorrow at 449-5000 and tell him you have a suggestion for improving trash pick-up.  Then Jacques will put you on his Enemies List.  Even Jacques' friends know what crazy he is.  We need someone who will put the issues of this city before themself.  Jacques won't do that.  In his world, it's all Jacques all the time.  Let's give him a much needed rest, OK?  He can get back to his law practice.  That's what Madiba calls a win-win.

Confucius Favorite Sun Tzu Qoutes

Tired of Sun Tzu yet? Confucius say now is time to laugh at Mini Mayor and his arrogant Sun Tzu self. It would be bombdiggity if Mini Mayor would pop off a few of these Sun Tzus (for more laughs - some of it NC-17, check out the Uncyclopedia page on Sun Tzu:

• "Know your Sun-Tzu quotes. Also, know your Sun-Tzu per-seat licensing strategy, and your Sun-Tzu support and maintenance plan."

• "Know what your enemies are afraid of. They will retreat, and you will destroy them without fighting any lawsuits."

• "There are only five musical notes. Those who say there are actually twelve notes in an octave are simply trying to mess with your head."

• "Know your enemy, know yourself, know your girlfriend's ex-con husband's abusive temperament, know his work schedule, and most importantly know the fastest way to get the hell out of there if he decides to come home early."

• "What does not kill you will hurt a lot."

• Wise is the man that knows when to fight. Wiser is the man that knows when to just shut the f*** up."

• "Keep your friends close, but keep your M&M's closer."

• "To subdue the enemy by sticking them with a "kick me" note is the acme of skill. Unless they pull out a yo momma insult, then cap 'em."

• "Always remember, pikemen defeat horsemen, but archers defeat pikemen."

• "For one to be successful in war, one must yell 'BOOM HEADSHOT' every time one kills an enemy".

• The first one... that was the RPG, right? I guess that was pretty good, for those days. But then the second one, the RTS that was awesome. But C&C beats it hands down, beautiful stuff. Then of course you had the third one, which was rendered realtime, but the cinematics... totally awesome. And now they have that whole MMORPG thing going, that looks pretty cool too, if you ask me." (on the Art of Warcraft and being a lifeless nerd in his parents basement)

• "A full-house beats a flush. A sword beats a full-house."

• "Victory cannot be achieved by swanning about and reciting bad poetry, unless you are fighting an enemy that gives up or simply dies outright upon being exposed to swanning and bad poetry."

• "If your enemy wins the war, you did not. Or, more likely, you were probably reading a copy of my book that you didn't pay for."

• "You are weak. Do you know why you are weak? It is because you lack... Skittles."

Your Mail - Thoughts on Jacques Narcissism and Nihilism

We've gotten some mail about who is Jacques Barack.  This reader hit the nail on the head.  This is pretty deep thinking, people.  To-To ain't gonna publish anything this impressive:

What riles people like Jacques and the clowns at the TT is that Jacques Barack still chooses to remain anonymous. Egoists not only get jealous at others' success, but they also cannot fathom why anyone with a chance to take the stage and receive the adulation of the masses does not do so. It confuses them and attacks their world view, because for them it is all about "being somebody". To see that not everyone wants what they think is the ultimate goal of any living being forces them to question their own validity and life choices.

Behind every publicity seeking buffoon is a weak and insecure little man (or woman) in need of constant reinforcement. I give you Jacques M. Roy as a textbook example.  He is a narcissist who can't turn away from the mirror.  Of course, the ultimate fate of narcissism is nihilism.  They work towards nothing and nothing is accomplished.

Jacques Barack et al are "somebodies" without being somebodies. They won't be approached for autographs on the street, cannot get the best table in a restaurant, and are not sought out to appear in the halls of power and enlighten others of their kind (at least not publicly).

You are the enemy because you invalidate them and all they hold dear.

Keep up the great work!

Oh, rest assured that we gonna keep it up until our mission is accomplished.  We're glad that we're getting more input from our readers and we encourage more.   Jacques Barack is a forum for positive change.  Jacques Barack is a movement to improve Alexandria.  Jacques Barack is you.  The more involved you are, the harder for old Alexandria to keep their death grip on this town.  Please send your input to jacquesbarack@gmail.com.